So I got in another one of my moods. But it's over now. I'm still contemplative.
I still over-analyze.
Do they have a medication called "STFU."
I need some of that D;

Why do I constantly question why I do things and who I am.
It gets annoying after a while.
And I'm sure I annoy the hell out of certain people when I talk to them about it.

Wow. I annoy myself. That's kinda sad isn't it?
How do I change that....?
Hmm..

I'm glad I'm back at school. I had a good break. I had fun with some friends even though this weekend didn't go as well as planned..and some shit happened.

Larissa Kevin and I hung out Saturday night, like old old times. It was great.
Guy I have been seeing since july and I broke up. It really sucked at first because it felt like it would work. Like he was actually someone I could see myself with.. but that was naive.
We're in two separate worlds. And it was great while it lasted. But hello. I'm at college. Long-term relationships are pointless lmao. Especially long-distance.
He's a great guy and I know that after a while of awkwardness, we'll be friends.

Upside! Noww I can talk to the guys I've been eyeing ;D
And that one really really hot chick.. even though I think she's straight.
I will talk to them >:[

GOD. I freakin love this place!!!
All distractions are done with. I'm ready to get my head back in the game.

MIYAVI CONCERT SOOOOOOOON. Well.. not sooon. BUT it's coming up!!

Just got back from a nice weekend home. Have so much to do this week for school before fall break.
I have a paper to write tonight, which I am about to work on. A vocab quiz to study for Japanese for tomorrow. I have that kinship chart and paper to do for Anthropology.
Totally flunked the exam but I did really really good on the Japanese test. I'm gonna bring up all my grades and work harder.
Class attendance for Anthropology is... suck. Pretty much screwed it up in the long run. How many days have I missed so far? 4? I can only miss one more now. Which will be this Friday. FML. If I can't miss this Friday's then I'll figure something out.

Mom and I have plans for this weekend. Going to the movies and hanging out. Spending a lot of time together. I miss her a lot and I hate that she's alone. She's working really hard on her master's degree classes.

Get Kaz that money I owe her this weekend so then she may not be pissed at me anymore. Lol I wouldn't blame her for holding a grudge, but whateverz.  Plan out next trip more strategically. Money-wise.

Our dorm has a piano so I brought my books. I can continue practicing. Which makes me super happy.

358/2 DAYS COMES OUT TOMORROW. I'm sooo happy I was able to get a game of my own like this. It's exciting. I know I'm gonna wanna be play it when I get it. But School comes first.

Get that ps2 cord from Mishi this weekend so I can pick up on Xenosaga. I remember being stuck. and broke. looking for monies. LOL as Jr. on Gainun's ship.

Pandorum was such a bitchin movie. Saw it this weekend. It was sooo awesome. I loved it so much. REN NEEDS TO SEE IT?
I wanna take my mom to see it this weekend. I wonder if Ren would like to come with us? Bring her mommy?
THEY NEED TO GET TOGETHER SOME TIME!
But Mom's been busting her ass between her work and her master's degree. So we'll figure something out.

LINDSEY COMES HOME IN NOVEMBER. One more month before I see that crazy bitch sister of mine. I miss her crazy.
Leslie still isn't talking to me. Mom's making up excuses. She feels bad. But it's okay. If Leslie wants to act like a high-and-mighty queen, she's more than welcome. But she isn't acting like that towards me. I'm not dealing with her superiority complex. I'm not some kid. I'm her sister. She needs to learn how to act like it.

Uhhhhmmm... I can't think of anything else to post about. I feel the need to listen to some DBSK...

Ok. quit stalling. PAPER >:0
RAWR.

I can't say things aren't going bad.
That would be an utter lie.
I love this school.
I love my friends here. All of them.
I have Andrea in majority of my classes and Markree and I hang out basically everyday.
Mandy, my roommate is really cool. We get along real well.
I've met some really nice girls in my dorm. some are crazy and funny some are really sweet.

I've been sick lately and have fallen into another "self pity" mood.
One day I'll have grown out of my emotional irrationality.
I'd like that day to be tomorrow.

I hate going through these emotional spins... not knowing what to think or feel.
I want to be strong.
But I guess that'll take time...
Something I really don't have any patience toward.
I hate how I've been lately. I can't explain it. But change needs to happen.
I do so many things to please people.. I'm always worried about what people think of me.
I need to work on that a bit.. hmm.. I need to learn how to CTFO. when i don't know whats goin on I become paranoid.
That needs to be worked on.

I get home sick really easy. It's harder than I thought.

I miss sitting in Larissa's room, playing cards for hours on end, watching independent films and eating our weight in chocolate, talking about everything in the world. Talking about the past. Laughing our hearts out. We're like two old souls together.

Mikalah would come get me, in her bagged s10. We would spend the whole night talking. Nothing but talking. Corey would join in. We would get prettied up and go out to Lobby. Meet all of our friends there. I miss those nights, too.

I skipped my boy Dustin's (dustin blada) birthday party last time I was home because of a shitty emotional spin I was in. I owe him big time. Offered to take him to a dinner and a movie. He's the coolest guy I've ever known. We talk about everything. He's so crazy. He's the best guy friend a girl could ask for.

I miss my mom. and my dogs. and even the cat. I miss my couch. I miss us waking up early to watch movies on the TCM channel.

But... I'm glad I'm here. I owe a lot to Renny for pushin me to this. I really need it. I need to do this. For me. I'm here for a good damned reason. And I'll be home soon enough.

KH DS game is comin out soon... But i need a new DS. Mine fried like a bitttch.
RAWR. Get paid tomorrow maybe?

Money makes things better. Some things.
Buy myself a new personality?